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Can’t Read the Writing on the Wall
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
A cartoon showing a patient laying on the couch at a psychiatrist’s office saying, “I finally see the writing on the wall, but it was written by a doctor so I can’t read it.”

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Caught Something Nasty
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
A doctor says to his patient who is holding something in a catcher’s mitt, “Looks like you caught something nasty there.”

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Extra Nipples Side Effects
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
“I’ve heard that your medication can grow extra nipples, but I wouldn’t worry about that if I were you.”

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Fist Bump Doctor
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00

I’m fist-bumping all of my patients now, because it spreads fewer germs than a handshake.

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Flu Bonanza
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
A doctor says to his patient who has a pig snout, wings, and cow patterns on him, “You’ve managed to catch bird flu, swine flu, and a touch of Mad Cow disease.”

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Hypochondria Health Records
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
Sorry I’m late, I had to retrieve your health records.

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Hypochondria Scan
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
Well, we’ve probed and diagnosed you thoroughly and still have found nothing. Now Dr. Thompson here would like you to lie down in his office for a special “hypochondria scan.”

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Inner Phone Scroller
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
“I did finally get in touch with my inner child but he just kept scrolling on his phone.”

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Medical App Update
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
It’s been telling you to blood-let a pint a day? When’s the last time you updated that medical app?

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Photobombed X-rays
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
Somehow you got photobombed during your x-rays!

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Piggy Bank IV
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
Piggy Bank IV

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Popsicle Doctor
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
Here’s another popsicle stick for ya, doc.

Thanks, Earl.

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Schizophrenic Doctor
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
Wow, three opinions for the price of one- what a bargain!

Erwin Swanson, schizophrenic doctor.

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Second Aid
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
The first aid team has the day off.

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Side Effect Voices
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
The voices from my prescription side effects say you should consider lowering the dosage.

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Student Nurse Victim
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
A student nurse drew my blood and all I got was this lousy t-shirt.

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Telemedicine Triumph
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
“Man, this telemedicine thing is great– I don’t even have to put my pants on!”

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Toilet Water On The Brain
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
Your lab work came back positive for toilet water on the brain.

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Voice Mailbox Setup
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
“To help with the constant ringing in your ears, I’m prescribing instructions to set up your voice mailbox.”

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Voodoo Doctor
Price range: $20.00 through $100.00
Well, doc, I still have that pain in my back…

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